Thursday, January 16, 2014

R.I.P., 'Funeral With a View'

This is the third time I'm sitting here trying to write this damned post.  Flying in the face of my blog's title, I'm going to keep it succinct, or at least make the attempt...hehe

I'm putting 'Funeral With a View' aside.  Indefinitely. 

The decision came to me on Monday.  I've lost 'the feels' (yes, mark this date...I actually said 'the feels') for the story.  For the past couple weeks, as I was going over the printed copy, making notes, jotting down ideas for fixes based on some sticking points that had been pointed out to me, I've felt like an exposed nerve on two legs; grumpy, down, ready to quit.  You get the idea.  It's not that I feel the book is crap.  Does it need some changes?  Sure does.  Can I facilitate those change?  You bet.  Do I feel like it?  Not right now.

Despite being received rather well by beta readers, I'm not happy with the story.  Even if I were to polish what's dull, I'm not into the book.  It's my story and I have to be pleased with it.  Right now I am not pleased with it.

There comes a time when, if something you're supposed to enjoy doing turns you into a complete asshole, you may just wanna step away from it.  So that's exactly what I'm doing.  Truth be told, I feel so much better for not being so damned stubborn.  Part of me thought that if I didn't get it out within the next couple months, if I put it aside and let it sit, all the hours/months/weeks I'd spent editing, trimming, editing again, printing, making notes, would have been nothing but a waste of time.

Silly, silly man =D

Nothing's a waste if you can learn from it.  And I have learned a few things.  One: while I'm not satisfied with the overall story of FWAV, the actual writing in and of itself is better than anything I've produced to date. Two:  I now take constructive criticism much better than I used to.  Three (and this is the most important): I know to walk away and let things simmer if they're not working out.

Hey, I'm a part time hobbyist.  I don't have to keep up with full timers.  I don't have to worry about people 'forgetting' about me if I don't publish X books a year.  I don't have to stress about things to the point where I'm ready to take a butane lighter to the manuscript and give it a Viking funeral.  I write when I can, and I publish when I have something I feel is good enough to unleash on an unsuspecting general-type public.

'Funeral With a View' is NOT dead.  I won't allow it to be.  It was the first book I'd ever written and there's gold in them thar hills.  It'll take some time and thought and some elbow grease, but I'll get back to it...when the time is right.  Now just isn't that time.  Ain't no thang, right?

Am I done writing?  Hellz no.  In fact, I think I hear someone knocking on my door, and I think his name is Seth Gabriel.  I've kinda missed the pork-chop side-burn sporting, tequila swigging wiseass  and his whacky crew.  There may even been an idea or two floating around in my noggin.  Seth, a haunted school...  Nah.  That would be a complete bore-fest.

So much for succinct.  See?  I'm feeling better already.


  1. I'm excited for you to get back to loving writing and reading and I know FWAV will be better for it in the long run. It took me YEARS to revisit the thing that's now Fatal Reaction and I was so motivated by the complete rewrite that I'm doing it again! After Better Left Buried releases I'll have no more novels to revisit, and that's kind of a bummer. One door closes, another opens and all that. Consider FWAV your security blanket, for now. The thing you can go back to even if your mind closes up like a steel trap. It's Seth's time to shine and I, for one, am excited to see what's next for him!

    1. Thanks, Belinda. Funny you should say 'security blanket'. During this whole process I couldn't help but wonder if part of the reason I tried so hard with FWAV was to delay starting something completely from scratch. Anxiety strikes when I'm staring at that first blank page. BUT, a Seth story is swirling around in my head, becoming that much more coherent every time I think about it. Time to start doing a wee bit of research and bust out the notepad. A first for me! lol

  2. You've pretty much summed up how I felt about my writing last year. Good to know it's not just me!

    1. Nope, not just you, Naomi. =) Nice to have company, isn't it? LOL