Nerves and Lunacon

Howdy, you few, you faithful, you poor unfortunates who clicked that 'next blog' button and just happened to end up here at Overly Verbose.  Welcome back or, welcome for the first time as the case may be.  What do I  have to say?  Not a whole hell of a lot, quite frankly but it's been well over a week since my last post so I figured I should put up something.

So, here goes.

Nerves: I has them.  My Urban Fantasy novel is now in the hands of five very generous beta readers.  One of the reasons I haven't been updating my blog regularly as of late (besides the blatant lack of anything interesting to say) is that I'd spent the last two weeks editing the crap out of it...literally and figuratively.   I'd written it when I didn't have much experience under my belt (*ahem* still don't /*ahem*) and man did it ever show!  While I didn't change any major story elements, it still took me two weeks go re read it and sometimes, change the way I'd gone about saying things line after line after line after line (getting the point?) after line after line.  By the time I was done I was staring at a sea of red.  BUT, I'll say it was worth it for sure.  The product I'd sent off to the Fearsome Five (my betas) was much better than what I'd originally written.  So, why the nerves?   I'll tell you that...IN ANOTHER PARAGRAPH!

I've friended a lot of author-ish people on Facebook lately, so I snoop around and see what they're up to, what they're working on, etc., etc.  I see a lot of 'so excited about my new project! Best thing I've ever done to date!' and the like.  As for me?  I read something I've written, lean back, scratch my chin and say 'meh, it hasn't made me throw up yet'.  That's usually a good sign; it means I don't hate it.  But that's generally all the credit I give myself.  Sometimes I can't help but wonder if they're blowing smoke or they really believe in what they're doing that much?  Does the fact that I'm constantly wondering if the three or four thousand words I've just cranked out are complete and total shit mean that I ain't got the goods?  Does it mean that I'll forever be one of those 'indie guys' that well established authors snigger and flip boogers at behind their back?  This segues me into the part about the nerves...IN ANOTHER PARAGRAPH! (Note: I never said it would be the next paragraph up above..ha! Made ya look!)

So, I'm nervous because I'm on pins and needles wondering what the betas are going to say about my manuscript.  Will they find it totally FUBAR (Fucked Up Beyond All Recognition), the greatest thing since sliced bread (sliced bread is fantastic...big fan), or somewhere in between?  So far, I haven't heard from any of them...save one.  I'd gotten a text earlier today saying that if I did something unseemly to one of the characters in my book that they would 'visit me for an ass kicking'.  That made me feel good.  Great actually.  Why?  Because I'd written a character that they're enjoying.  I'd written a character that they would like to see more of!  So that made me feel nice.  

Now, to other things.

Lunacon.  A few friends of mine invited me (read: browbeat) to go to this fantasy convention in upstate New York called Lunacon.  Turns out, some of the lovely people over at Padwolf Publishing (publishers of Apocalypse 13 where my first short story 'Hollow' calls home--on sale now by the way!!!!) are going and would like me to be there.  This will be the first time I'll be meeting these folks who I've spoken to for so many years on Facebook and have had the distinct pleasure of being in an anthology with, so I'm very much looking forward to it.  I won't be presenting or signing or anything.  I'm just going to hang out with the gang and party and people watch (maybe there will be some voluptuous Cosplay female type personages there!) and have a good time.  Who knows?  Maybe I'll get discovered!  Or not.  In any event, it's gonna be fun!  If you're near Rye New York and happen to be going to Lunacon, say hi!  I'll be the heavyset guy with the shaved head.  

So, this turned out to be more verbose than I'd originally planned.  Hey, as the French say, say lah veee!!!  Once again, thanks for stopping by what I'm pretty sure is the very last webpage on the internet.   

Until next time, take care!

M.